The 10 Stages of Ending a Friendship
Cutting off a close friend is never — and we do mean never — a fun experience. But, unfortch, sometimes it just has to be done. Maybe you’ve realized what a terrible person she is, or maybe you guys have simply grown apart.
Whatever the reason for your friend break-up, everyone goes through these ten stages when ending things:
1. Minor annoyances. This is how it always starts. Why does she chew that way? Has she always left their nail clippings on my bedroom floor? You know, the kind of stuff that almost always leads to…
2. Silly arguments. More like “really ridiculously stupid arguments,” but you get the point.
3. Drifting. A few days, maybe even weeks go by and you notice you haven’t heard a peep from them.
4. Exclusion. The casual forgetting to invite her out turns into actively avoiding hanging out with her.
5. Resentment. Like an unfortunate pimple on Picture Day, it just grows.
6. Exchange of stuff. Just like a romantic break-up, you’ve gotta return each other’s respective belongings. Awkwaaard.
7. Overall crappiness. For being a bad friend, for having them be a bad friend to you.
8. Reminiscing. Remember when you guys used to get along so well?
9. Fielding questions. “What happened to so-and-so? I thought you guys were, like, attached at the hip!” Ugh.
10. Deleting her phone number. Which is the end of all endings because it’s just so permanent.