8 John Green Male Characters That Are Thirsty AF

By  | 

“Thank you, John Green, for setting the bar for unrealistic romantic dreams.” We can bet big money you’ve said that before. We’re not gonna lie, so have we. Like, who hasn’t completely swooned over The Fault in Our Stars‘ Augustus Waters (Ansel Elgort) and his adorable one-liners, or totally pined for Quentin Jacobsen (Nat Wolff) in Paper Towns because of his devotion to Margo Roth Spiegelman?

Butttt… We think it’s time to finally take a step back and see the bigger picture here, people. Good ol’ Gus was concerned with checking one thing off his to-do list: losing his V-card. And, while Q’s quest to find Margo may seem heroic in theory, it’s actually creepy and borderline stalking. What. The. Eff. John?!

Whatever happened to old-fashioned courting and puppy love? We bet you’re re-thinking all those characters you fell in love with during your initial read. Yup, so did we, which is why we put together the eight John Green guys that are seriously thirsty AF: