An Ode To Our Favorite Birthday Boy, Joe Jonas

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As we’ve already told you when we age-ified him just yesterday, it’s quite the week for Joe Jonas.

First comes the premiere of his new reality competition show, The Next: Fame Is At Your Doorstep tomorrow, only one day after his birthday! That’s definitely not a coincidence, guys. So even though Joe probably has everything on the planet he could possibly want at the moment (except for maybe a girlfriend — ouch), we present him with this birthday poem, full of our clever quips about the 23-year-old. Annnnnd break:

Mr. Joe Jonas has done quite a lot this year
From a solo album to some new TV gigs, he’s got a blossoming career.
So of course we have to congratulate Joe on his birthday today
So let us get started with what we wanna say:

Your older bro, Kevin, is married to Danielle
Little bro Nick was on Broadway and in NYC did he dwell
As for the middle bro, Joe? We don’t know where to begin.
But Joe’s def a hottie, so uh, that’s somethin’?

But what a long way you’ve come since Disney’s Camp Rock
You’re now a bondafide rockstar whom online we do stalk.
Then you came out with your album and the single, “See No More”
And of course we can’t forget the Britney Spears tour.

You’ve dated lots of ladies like Taylor Swift and Ashley Greene
And you were so famous and on covers of all the magazines
But now you are single, and we’re not sure how we feel
We just want you to find a girlfriend that’s real!

But in the meantime, the JoBros reunion is so great
And for your new album we anxiously wait
But now we end this birthday poem on a high note,
You’re hot, rich and famous, Joe. Go ahead and gloat.

Read Last Year’s Birthday Poem for Nick Jonas!