For the First Time, Daniel Howell Opens Up About His Battle with Depression
You’ve known Daniel Howell a long time — maybe not by first and last name; most likely for his YouTube channel, danisnotonfire, which was introduced in 2009. If not by that, then perhaps for his BBC Radio 1 show, Dan and Phil, with best friend/fellow YouTube star Phil Lester, which first came to fruition in 2013. Whatever the case may be, you know him, you love him and most assuredly think of him as the life of the party.
Sadly… he’s far from it.
In a video titled, “Daniel and Depression,” the 26-year-old Brit opens up about his mental-health struggles for the first time with his 6.5 million subscribers, saying, “Today I’d like to talk about something that I’ve never shared before and I know that this may come as a shock to literally everyone I’m sure, but I’ve suffered from depression.”
“I haven’t talked about this before because I’ve always felt like it was something I was still going through, and not something I was over and suddenly ready to talk about,” he continues. “But I’m in a reasonably good place right now, and it’s a huge part of my life that I just think it’s weird for me to not talk about.”
Depression is a mental illness that makes you feel low all the time, but it affects people differently. In Dan’s case, “Depression is like I’ve fallen into a hole that ‘normal life’ and everybody else is out of reach, and I’m stuck on the floor in the dark. I don’t feel sad; I don’t want to cry; it’s that I don’t feel anything at all… as if life has desaturated.”
He adds, “When I’m depressed I have no energy; I have no will to do anything other than lie lifelessly in bed for hours, or sometimes on the floor, which is so much less comfortable and ergonomic.”
The vlogger even mentions loss of appetite as a side effect.
Fellow Internet celebrity Zoe Sugg, who was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder when she was 14, proudly acknowledged Dan’s video, tweeting:
This was really great Dan 👍🏼 loved it & this will help so many people 💗 https://t.co/x25enGLqYs
— Zoë (@Zoella) October 11, 2017
To that, he said:
thanks zoe! you've always been one of the youtube communities best role models when it comes to mental health so that means a lot 🙂
— Daniel Howell (@danielhowell) October 11, 2017
Dan says that he hopes that by talking about it with his viewers, it’ll help others.
Believe it or not, a lot of YouTube stars quit YT because of their mental-health struggles: