Andrea Russett Comes Out as Bisexual After Discovering BFF is Homophobic

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Coming out should be a beautiful, freeing time in any LGBTQ+ person’s life but, unfortunately, Andrea Russett‘s experience is a little different. The YouTube star came out as bisexual to her close friends and family members about four years ago and decided to tell her truth to her millions of followers on September 21, not because she felt fully ready, but because she learned that former BFF Sandra Poenar is homophobic.

The 23-year-old revealed the heartbreaking details in a statement posted to Instagram.

Andrea wrote, “Sandra and I had a very close, very public friendship. Because of that, I feel it’s best I just address this so we can all move on. I came out to Sandra as bisexual four years ago. (Surprise! Yeah. Not exactly how I planned to come out publicly, but sh*t happens I guess). Anyway, she was the very first person I came out to. Following this, as I came out to more and more friends, she was always there to give me advice on girls I liked. She sat with me while I cried about the thought of coming out to my parents. She knew me better than anyone in my life. She was family to me.”

“Over the last year, my friend who is openly gay, attended a nondenominational church with Sandra,” she continued. “On the drive home he was asking questions about her views on religion, one of them being, ‘So do you think I’m going to hell because I’m gay?’ Sandra responded, ‘Yes.’ She went on to tell him that he can be ‘saved’ with conversion therapy. When he shared this information with me I was.. at a loss for words. But still, I knew I needed to ask her directly. I needed to hear it from her mouth. So I did just that.”

When the YouTuber asked Sandra straight up if she thinks she’s going to hell because she’s bisexual, Sandra didn’t beat around the bush with her heartbreaking response of “yes.”

“She went on to tell me that she believes being gay [is] a choice. I asked her is these have always been her views and she said yes. I will never find the words to properly describe [the] hurt I felt in that moment. She was one of the only people I trusted in my life. And now all I can do is rethink every conversation we had, every situation in which I was with a girl around her, and wonder what she really thought of me. Wonder if she was judging me. It is a very deep and personal hurt that I do not plan on acknowledging or discussing after this post. I am heartbroken and confused. I don’t know why she chose to move in with me while having these beliefs. I don’t know that I even want to know at this point.”

Although Andrea is obviously heartbroken right now, she also feels relieved that she can finally live her truth publicly.

“It feels like a weight has been lifted, and like I can BREATHE,” she tweeted.